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       The Clashing 

                                       of the 

                    Blades…

                    Submitted by Joe Grand

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you ever thought about of going against the grain of conventional wisdom? It takes moral strength and courage to face the neighbors you haven't spoken to for three years, even if truth is on your side.

     Ever notice when cutting grass on a summer day the scattering power of the mower? It throws grass clippings up to six feet.  It sends debris all over the patio, the front of the house and the sidewalk.

         And have you tried to get rid of the grass clippings on the sidewalk by running your mower down it? Feeling a little odd if anyone were to come by and inquire as to why you are mowing the sidewalk, your prepared answer is that you are really just choosing the easiest path to another part of the lawn. Those prepared answers are the best aren't they? The great part is the wind created by the whirling of the blades really does clear the walk once again and saves you from having to sweep it.

         Now doesn't it stand to reason that when the snow comes in the middle of winter, you could go and fire up the mower and run it up and down the sidewalk with the same effect?

         I only put this question to those who own lawnmowers because I know you have thought of it. You can see yourself out there pushing your Lawnboy up and down the 

walk, grass catcher removed, when your benevolent neighbor appears with his new two thousand dollar snow blower heading straight in your direction. He has concluded that only a new two thousand dollar machine will suffice in the removal of snow; and has decided in an unwelcome moment of generosity to plow not only his walk, but completely up and down the whole street. From a distance he stares in your direction with disbelief.

     Let's face it, everyone stares at you in disbelief.

     At this point you vaguely wonder if you could have hired a teenager? Not to worry, as he approaches you are thinking up another prepared answer. When the two machines meet, the mind - always at the ready in emergencies - falters. As he passes within a foot you hear yourself shouting at him "Here's Johnny!"

    As I sit here writing this, it's snowing in Toronto and the snow is heading this way. They are saying ten to fifteen centimetres by the morning...

                                  Joe Grand

 

 

 

Jaywalker, February 2004

 

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Jaywalker, February 2004

 

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